I got fat.
Things in my closet stopped fitting me. Nothing at my favorite stores looked good on me anymore. I never particularly cared about my appearance, so it shouldn’t have hit me so hard. However, getting fat combined with getting old and losing energy for everyday activities got me somewhat bad. I got depressed.
My goal at PinKixx is to make women feel confident everyday. That doesn’t mean I don’t get depressed. I do indeed from time to time.
Getting depressed or feeling lost happen to everyone. Even confident people. It shouldn’t discourage anyone. What matters is that how to deal with it quickly in a healthy way. I don’t get depressed often. I guess I kind of forgot how to deal with it. It took me a while to get back to my usual positive status this time. From this rare experience, I learned some things I’d like to share.
1. Face the problem right away
When I got fat and nothing fit, I didn’t feel good about myself. I lost confidence in me. When something like that happens, I usually pick up myself and get back to my own self pretty quickly. This time it went deeper. I left it linger long enough, it actually made me depressed.
It came slowly, I denied it for a long time, as long as I could as a matter of fact, without facing the problem. ‘it’s not a big deal. i’ll just pick something that still fits me, i’m still okay’ or ‘oh, it’s because i just had a meal. it’s not too bad.’ I convinced myself again and again. I had good excuses. “I’m busy,” “I can’t stop,” “I can deal with it later,” “it’s not a big deal”… When I got too fat, and it was too late. I was already depressed and unhealthy.
I went through ‘what am i doing’ to ‘i can’t do anything.’ With the holiday approaching, with all the tasks and busy schedules ahead, I lost the motivation or energy to go on. It was terrible.
If I admitted it and get help right away or face the problem and work on it early, it wouldn’t have gone that bad until I had to stop completely and couldn’t even look at myself in the mirror.
Don’t delay if you have a problem. Don’t be afraid of challenge. If you procrastinate, it’ll get much harder and longer unnecessarily. You might never make it. Take charge in the problem. Face it. Don’t let it grow too big.
2. Think about what’s important to you
When I get depressed, I lost where I was, where I was going, and even what I was living for. I lost the sight of what was important in my life.
Maybe at some point, I started to focus on insignificant matters and got obsessed with it for no reason. When you lose the big picture and the destination, you get lost and feel discouraged. You don’t feel what you’re doing doesn’t mean anything anymore.
If you’re stuck and depressed, take a deep breath, and think about what’s important to you. Where were you going? What do you want? Focus your mind.
Everyone’s priority is different. Your first priority may be different from mine. There is no right or wrong answer. Think. Why do you do what you do? What’s the purpose of your life? What do you really want? It’s time to recharge your purpose.
3. Get help. It’s not to be ashamed
I’m not just talking about doctors or sessions. Get connected with friends and family. Talk to them honestly, and let them help you. Tell them what you need. Talk to them more often. Have positive people around you. This is the best medicine you need.
I started to walk around the block with my buddy. I signed up for exercise classes and hired a trainer. I started to admit that I’ve been getting older. I started to go out and shop for myself, not for my business. I talked to friends who wouldn’t believe me that I got fat and depressed and ask them to help me cheer up.
Use any medium that helps you. I realized that I haven’t laughed loud often these days, so I watched comedies, “the big lebowski,” “water boy,” “some like it hot,” “it happened one night,” etc. Also some action movies I used to be crazy about, “speed,” “blade runner,” “the big hit,” “red,” “lethal weapon” series, and “indiana jones” series, and some feel-good movies, such as “shakespeare in love,” “pride and prejudice,” “the wizard of oz,” “the sound of music,” “slumdog millionaire,” etc.
Reading books that make you calm and grow back your self-esteem is great too, “new earth,” “bedtime,” “the circle,” and more. Take your time. Relax. And, Smile.
Everyone has different ways to deal with depression when it happens. What do you do when you get depressed? Please share your wisdom with us in the comment.
And as always, be confident, PinKixxes!